the tail of the odd dragon slayer
by ekosoulfire
Summary: you would think if you were brutally ripped from your home and shoved into an anime you'd get the compensation of really cool powers WRONG! now follow lex and little bro ton-ton as they struggle with lex's stupid powers magic guacamole and ton-ton's sudden addiction to biting people if they get to close to lex
1. Chapter 1

I hate guacamole… but now it's my only way to survive

Ya know those times when you're sitting at your computer and suddenly start hearing noises like right after you read a really good creepypasta well I was having one of those times when suddenly someone grabbed my shoulder… now I'm not a huge fan of physical touch and so I was bout ready turn all 12 yrs of self-defense training on whoever it was standing behind me when I was spun around to face a… child- yea a freaking kid, now if it were a little girl I would totally be able to kick her sorry behind to the moon but nooo it had to be the most adorable little boy in existence so I had to go and be nice "hi there sweetie you lost?" the little boy shook his head saying "no you're needed somewhere else you're needed to **BE** **SOMEONE** else" now at this point this kid was starting to freak me the crackerjacks out and I was about to ignore myrule of not hitting little boys when his hand still on my shoulder stared glowing " **YOU WILL NOW BECOME THE MOST POWERFUL DRAGONSLAYER OF ALL."** NOW I had started to lose my bumble berries. " **YOU WILL GO AND RIGHT ALL THE MISTAKES FAIRY TAIL YOU CAN DO AS YOU WISH WITH YOUR POWERS BUT BE WARNED IF YOU DO NOT REPLENESH THEM YOU WILL DIE UNDERSTOOD?"** "Y-yes s-sir" **"GOOD I CAN'T DEAL WITH ANOTHER HEADACHE"** I was nodding my head vigorously at that point scared to speak "uu-mm can I leave r-right I don't want to delay this any longer." " **FINE PLEB.** " "what is my dragon slaying power?" " **YOU WILL NOW BE KOWN AS THE GUACAMOLE DRAGON SLAYER!** " my eyes widen with horror as a white light over took me I went out of this world screaming "NOOOOOOO!"

END OF PART ONE.

Explanation: I am really freaked out by little girls just to many bad experiences to not be but I have had nothing but good times with my little brother with his ever adorable nickname ton-ton he loves fairy tail to and he has a school boy crush on Ezra it is adorizybubbles.


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N. just want to thank cityhick for their thoughtful review and to ask everyone for constructive comments yes I just gave you all an engraved invitation to flame me where I stand any who onto the story. I think it obvious that I don't own fairy tail or any other fandoms that might be mentioned in this story this will be your only warning. In the comments please tell me what you think ton-ton's powers should be. Be warned grammar matters little to me if at all basically if my A.P. teacher doesn't care I don't either**

STORY

' _Now this is a story all about how  
my life got flipped-turned upside down  
and I'd like to take a minute  
Just sit right there  
I'll tell you how I became a guacamole slayer of fairy tail' _

Yeaa I was humming that when my little brother and a bag of stuff fell on my head well at least I won't be alone suddenly ton-ton was all up in my face screaming "LEX, WHERE ARE WE AND WHERE IS NIINII AND NEE-CHAN SHOULDN'T THEY BE WATCHING US WHEN MOMMY AND DADA AREN'T HOME?!" I wiggled my ears which were bleeding profusely and I'm pretty sure my eyes were those spirals with my soul hanging out my mouth but ton-ton shoved it back down. He looked down bashfully "sorry Lex I–what are you wearing!?" I look down to see the most unassuming but comfortable outfit ever (look up Gothar from 7 deadly sins for outfit info) I look at ton-ton he looks like a bad Negi knock-off his outfit was perfect but he had my same dark blood w/ yellow gold high lights actually the only real difference is the fact besides height and age is his eyes stayed the same expressive silver-blue while mine change constantly and w/out warning.

We both had our hair the same defiant (to our family) ear-scraping length while the rest of our 'family' keeps theirs at least mid-back or longer we thought it stupid and harder to manage so *chop* it's gone after that the only one that didn't look at us with disdain was our older brother C.J. or bubbles but he moved out so now we have no one to give a bloody heck about us and now we're trapped in the fairy tail realm not knowing when where or exactly why I mean 'fix all of fairy tail's' mistakes that could be a number of things but none of them really need fixing and why did they decide to rip ton-ton from our home and shove him here with us- wow that brief description turned to a full-on rant and ton-tons saying something "-other! Big sister! HALLLOWWW! YOU OKAY IN THERE!" "Yeah just lost in thought" ton-ton frowns at me "well do you at least know where we are?" "Yeah we're on earthland it's not that bad we just have to find fairy tail and we're set." I said the last part with no small amount of uncertainty and ton-ton heard it he whispered "but where on earthland and when?"

That stumped me he knew just what questions I was trying to avoid I look down and open my mouth to answer him when I hear a bunch of squeals. For the first time I actually look around and see that we're in an alley and there are like 30 girls standing in a circle and I recognized one of them. A large grin erupts on my face and ton-ton says "your eyes just turned red gold streaks so either you're irritated or about to pull a prank" "prank." I say simply finally looking through the bag that fell on my head with ton-ton inside were a few other outfits ones from home I frown looking back down at my clothes it kinda looked like I just got out of the hospital which was fine at the moment so I went back to searching. When I looked in the tech pocket I laughed my laptop was in there and so was my charger and solar charging port. Underneath the clothes was a whole bunch of my old self defense tools such as fishing string and flour while there are some new things to most I have experience with and can use then I saw the stash of guacamole and flipped. Forgetting the number of people that were standing feet away from me I yelled and ranted to little bro about my mortal enemy guacamole and all the times it has caused my downfall all the while he sat giggling as I drew a crowd when I ran out of both breath and steam I heard roarous laughter from all around me. I flush and snap "well shows over folks I'm sure you've got better things to do with your time then laugh at me, you too ton-ton shut up!" I could feel my eyes change from annoyed pink to scared yellow and green. Natsu looks shocked Lucy looked confused and curious bore slightly scared same with the other girls and ton-ton is looking at me worriedly until he remembered the crowd he turned to them and growled snapping his teeth at bora in particular. Bora tried to get close but ton-ton did something that shocked me to the bone HE BIT BORA. It confused me he had never shown violent tendencies before but I guess that sometimes a new world stresses people out just that much. 

END


	3. Chapter 3

**A.N. I can see a lot of people really don't care about this story and I really want you all to know that no matter how much you hate this story I will continue to write it and there is nothing you or anyone can do about it because this is something I promised one of my best friends and I will continue to write if only to bring a (soon to be if not already) far away friend a little laughter and hope (shout out to you Jamie).**

This, this is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me was the first thought running though my brain when my little ton-ton bit the idiot Bora not because of the biting but because bora though that I would fall under such an annoying enchantment I mean back home to mention that spell is like an instant trigger* warning and to mention someone is like Bora is like calling someone a troll with warts and a bad case of athletes foot so not very nice. I heard Bora growl and raise his hand like he was going to HIT little ton-ton his hand was just about to hit when we caught it we were not lex we had no name to most we are genderless* and human we were the rage that lex has carried and the willingness to do anything to protect those we love that happened to come into powers we didn't need or want and we wouldn't let no matter who or what it was hurt OUR FAMILY because we would raze heaven, earth, and hell for the beautiful little child standing behind us if it made him smile because the hatchling was ours and only ours with a dark look and sinister voice that made all gathered shiver we uttered " _do not hit our family try it again and it may very well be the last thing you ever do-"_ the idiot interrupted us with a "do you know who I am!" we stated in our tone _"we do not really care who you are and if you ever think about hurting anyone we care about again you will be destroyed understand –little wizard?"_ the idiot nodded fearful and trembling. We were about to let lex take back but the pink haired one with the odd smelling blue cat made a move towards the hatchling and letting the idiot fall we put ourselves between hatchling and the possible threat. In the back of our mind we registered idiot and his brainwashed hoard sneaking away not that we cared he was no longer a threat to hatchling the pink one seemed to realize what we were protecting and stopped we could smell him he smelled of flames and something that didn't quite sit well with us letting him this close to the hatchling who had chosen that moment to come and clutch at our garments hatchling looked with awe at the pink one and turned towards us and said "it's okay dargon I think that's Natsu the fire guy" dargon is what hatchling called us since our elder taught lex and hatchling about dragons first time hatchling met us he was trying to learn how to communicate and a slip of the tongue gave us our first name. The pink one seemed to start when hatchling stated his name we stood a little less defensive recognizing the name of a 'friend' it was hatchling that did the next stupid thing surprisingly. Hatchling seemed to think our less defensive stance was a sign that we were fine with him approaching the pink one- it wasn't we were just tolerating he presence at an exceptable distance. Nothing more nothing less no ifs ands or buts about it. To us he was just slightly more tolerable that the idiot that tried to hurt hatchling we said in a tired voice _"ya know what we're done hatchling is fine and we sense no ill intent so see ya"_ and we promptly pass out.

END

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